A Baby Again

Waking up at 6.15 in the morning is suddenly new again. It's somewhat like going back to a life I've left behind, but only somewhat. This morning while I was walking to the workplace I was thinking about everything that afflicted me these days, not great thoughts. But then I saw the man in front of me tossing bits of bread to the many pigeons that hang around in the field everyday. Sun rays were trying their best to pierce through the dusty air, and they kind of succeeded. Truckloads of foreign workers were sitting around in their trucks. Everything went on like nothing had happened.

 Morning air must be good for the soul.

Look Ma, I'm Invisible!

The upcoming F1 event has brought about a surge in the number of Japanese visiting the comic store. Japanese can be a little strange, they walk into the shop with nary a glance in your direction, and for the entire duration they look everywhere except at you. Then they always walk out looking straight ahead. It's as if you had a glance avoidance shield in place.

If you want to find out what it's like to have powers of invisibility, Absolute Comics is the place to be.

teeheehee

So I have very just finished viewing my dear cousin's photos on facebook, those taken with his girlfriend, in an album titled ":D" which, in my opinion, says very much about the state of their relationship and I think it's pretty awkward seeing him pose rather intimately with her. Well when I say intimately I don't mean they were eating each other's faces or something, they were really just hugging, and maybe it got slightly raunchier towards the end of the album where he was kissing/smelling her face. (HAHA what were you expecting huh?) I dunno man, there's just something quite uncomfortable seeing your cousins and their other halfs posing like that for photos. I mean, where's the guy who used to put bunny ears on your head in group pictures you know? And the guy who used to make funny faces at the camera? Where did he go too? Heehee.

IT'S SO WEIRD i still have that weird feeling in me, and it kinda makes me want to giggle awkwardly i don't know why. hahaaha somewhere else another cousin must be looking at my facebook photos thinking "This is SO WEIRD HEEHEE" *giggles*. HAHAH okay I just made myself feel weirder.

In another day and time, having dealt with secondary school kids I think they're quite a funny bunch, as in they really make me laugh and it's good. They call me "cher" and it makes me feel good too. HOHOHO. Well I wouldn't know because it was really pretty much a one off thing, and I don't know if after having to face them for 9 months in a year I would still think that they're "quite a funny bunch, as in they really make me laugh and it's good". Ah, I can still think about it then I guess.

So at work today there was a trainer who stopped his workout and hung around the counter for about 15 minutes, afterwhich he said "Okay i'm gonna go work out now, i just became smaller." Okay that's random.

You have a nice day too! (:

People in Life III

Quite some time ago, I met a man called Mr Loh.
He was an unscrupulous business man, and I felt like one of the black pieces in his business plan,
contributing to its growth in the small ways in which my role was mapped.

This Mr Loh always wore ties with tacky prints,
and trousers that seemed 2 sizes too big, and when he walked he strutted, and
he told all the black pawn pieces that he had cctvs in the store such that he could observe us from his house when he was not around.
His eye glasses were bifocal, and he always wore them near the tip of his nose.
When he looked at you he hardly blinked, and the only time he smiled
was when customers were about.

This man wasn't the best of bosses, but he was extremely acute:
his acumen for business is as sharp as a shark's tooth.
He played the customers like white pieces, and pitted us against them.
He only made his appearance when he deemed the customer worthy of his time and vile manipulation,
and you could be sure there was only one thing on his mind, or three if you prefer: It was always about the money, money, money.
Other times he couldn't be bothered and acted through his weaker business partner,
a chubby, dark complexioned man whose name sounded like Hester.

When Loh said he wanted to help you, that's when you should be cautious.
You could easily fall into the trap he spins with words to lure you in.
The lies he made us tell the white pieces were to be said with smiles,
he planted more lies among us, which almost made our friendships sour.
I'm only glad I got out fast because I could have been in a worse-off disposition
if I didn't have the foresight to ignore his dubious promises of flexible working hours and increased weekend wages.

Acute Businessman Loh, I'm glad to have met you -- at least you made me see the dark side of business and possible untrustworthiness of the people behind it. I wish never again to see you, because you look unpleasant as it is, and any mode of interaction is out of the question, I promise you won't see even glimmer of recognition in my face.

Hello Post Exams World!

Reading mel's blog inspired me to update mine. I think it's amazing that she's started a blog, and I really like reading her entries. (:
Jas' blog is so depressing, she's always talking about disappearing that I'm quite afraid that she might be entertaining some darn morbid thoughts. But I've got faith in her that she will tide through this, because like rachie says, bad things always pass, and I agree. Hang in there skippylee!
Datou's blog is pretty much about random things that I sometimes don't get. But recently she's been talking about her preparations for the exchange trip. Exchange sucks, it takes people away. =/ For 6 months at that.
Carinnie's blog is like mine, the entries hardly come, and the blog can't update itself, so in her words, "I think my blog is gathering mould."

Well I've been wanting to update for ages, but somehow exams, work, love and friends managed to get in the way. I still want to write about the fantabulous birthday that 9P did for me! Because I don't ever want to forget the euphoria of that day. I keep thinking, okay I shall do a post about my birthday, but I never do get to it because... well, see above. I also want to write about how the exams went, and how terrible it is when ray falls sick, and how i missed my mom when she went to vietnam, and how guilty I felt leaving my dad at home to eat dinner by himself when I went out everyday for one week after the exams, and oh, how I found this exact same La Dame aux Camelias quote in one of my previous blog entries on a schoolmate's blog. (What are the chances! The exact same passage with the exact same way of citing the author! Technically it isn't plagiarism because there was the book title and author's name, but it was weird seeing that, like someone just ripped your entire entry off your blog.) But well, you know, life got in the way I guess.

Right now I'm supposed to be doing editing. I've got like, 210 Word pages due on the 22nd, and then another 70 due on the 24th. And it's christmas week next week, I don't think it's even human for people to be doing work during christmas week! ): Why can't we have week long (or is it month long?) holidays like they do in China? And I've done christmas shopping for my family and I am so happy hohoho! I just know that they're gonna like their presents. Actually that's what I thought last year too, but it turned out that they didn't really like their presents. Nonetheless, it's a new year and a brand new christmas, so hurrah! They'll love their presents this year! But I haven't bought any for 9p and ray yet, and CHRISTMAS IS IN, WHAT, SIX DAYS?!! AND OF ALL TIMES I'VE GOT EDITING NOW?!?! AND WHAT ABOUT CHRISTMAS CARDS?! AAAAAAAH!

One thing though, I can't have xmas eve dinner with 9P because my folks are having it on christmas eve despite my relentless objections. ): And 9P always has dinner on christmas eve! Man. How do I resolve this. ): Gah.

Ray is sick with a throat infection poor boy. And I've got to go to my sister's house tomorrow at 9.30 am because she's expecting her furniture to arrive, and she doesn't have anybody else to accompany her so I'm gonna be nice and do it. After all her birthday's in 6 days' time. (: The dog is whining outside my room door I'm gonna let it sleep on my bed tonight because it's gonna be Christmas soon.











Nah the dog is imaginary. But the rest is real!

Not Old Enough to Grow Up.

When you're feeling like the loneliest person around in the office, what do you do?


You start thinking about how right you were when you decided that you're never going to work an office job.

When on the inside you're crying silently, but on the outside people are telling you to be strong for the others, what do you do?


You take deep breaths and take it as it goes.

When people turn to you, who do you turn to?


You look towards your inner self, and you see an escapist, who triumphs, and when things start to happen you ask yourself if it's your fault.
Or whether you should even have to take any responsibility for it at all.

What do you become?


You turn into a premature adult.

Why?


I wouldn't know why. Things happen for a reason.
But no matter how I look at it, I can't find a good enough reason.

When I Stare at Daniel Craig All Day.

I have been increasing my caffeine dosage over the period of work. On the first day of work I drank Milo for my breakfast drink, and managed to stay awake the entire day. Then I started drinking coffee made with two level teaspoonfuls of coffee powder, sugar and creamer. Then I realised the height of the coffee powder on my teaspoon was getting higher as the days went by. This morning I had coffee made with two heaped teaspoonsfuls of coffee powder, sugar and creamer. 6 hours of sleep each day doesn't qualify as sufficiency. ):

Work revolves around answering questions and feeling smart about it, like as if I were an IT genius. "Please close your browser and try again some time later. And don't worry your responses would have been saved" pretty much answers a whole list of technical questions along the likes of Fatal Errors, Denied Access and urm, uuurm, you know, the rest of it.

There's a Casino Royale postcard stuck on the cabinet compartment just above my workdesk, featuring Daniel Craig clad in a tuxedo, flaunting tall stacks of gambling chips, conjuring an enigmatic pose with his face tilted 34.9 degrees right, his pupils directed to the corners of his eyes, and the fingertips of his right hand placed in ever-so-light contact with a gun. Sometimes I feel him staring at the top of my head, but when I turn to look, his slitty eyes are back to staring sideways.

Work has been occupying my time such that my morbid thoughts have been left aside. Which is good because then I don't muck around wallowing in self-pity, which is a situation I know that I am occasionally extremely susceptible to. But work doesn't really feel like work because there is virtually no work to do. I almost feel guilty updating this blog during work. And my heart skips a beat whenever people walk past my cubicle at the same time I am surfing the Internet. I almost feel guilty thinking that the company pays me to surf the Internet.
Almost.
Okay I do, I do feel guilty, sometimes. I try to improve the situation by asking the colleagues around me for work, but most of the time they don't have work for me to do.
And rather than sitting around getting paid for doing nothing, I sit around, getting paid for surfing.

And making lists.

The Weekender's To-Do list.

1. Post pictures of happy times in blog entry. (:
2. Go cycling with DG tomorrow morning.
3. Attend donut party with aforementioned friend and cousin.
4. Catch up on sleep.